Father's Day 🧭

2022

A letter written by my Dad and I when he was still holding the baton. In memory of David Barg.

Next Sunday the nation celebrates Father’s Day! We have an exquisite new truffle collection for the occasion, as well as some thoughts about how we experience the holiday, which we know can be sweet, bitter, or bittersweet.

We would like to speak lovingly to those who have lost their Dads, whose paternal relationship is strained or altogether nonexistent, and perhaps most tenderly to those whose fathers are physically present here but so consumed by their own issues their afflictions, abusive, or not present, so tragically absent is their attention, affection, and consciousness.

In the words of psychologist Ramani Durvasul, “Family holidays often evoke difficult emotions […] and can foster a sense of ‘lack’ in those whose lives do not conform to the idealized images that apply to only a subset of the population.” Indeed we see this ever increasing as families interact differently for myriad reasons from divorce to artificial insemination. 

Gnosis aims to serve every holiday celebration while honoring diversity of faith and life experience, remaining sensitive to the triggers of feeling often unseen. We don’t want to be yet another company commercializing every holiday, inundating your inbox with reminders of something some might want to forget! But we also don’t cancel gendered or religious holidays as some companies have, because we see traditions - even those we don’t call our own - as opportunities to participate in collectively uplifting spirit.

Being your purveyor of theobroma cacao means so much more than making your chocolate - we are creating something that becomes a part of you! While some of our emails are purely about chocolate, we hope to deliver something of greater value (more valuable than chocolate… is that even possible!? we’re working on it!)

So, how can we transform this Father’s Day thing into a celebration for all? How can we adjust our sails to harness the lessons of hardship and actually enjoy the process of character building through adversity. Ugh, right? No! Welcome, painful moment - we’re going to perform alchemy of self and make this day magic.

In seeking the nuggets of universal Truth, we can reconfigure our association with a holiday; by examining its origins and symbolism or exploring the essence of what’s truly being celebrated, we can discover something genderless and timeless that unites us.

Let’s shift our focus from the holiday cards and traditional images of the “father” to the essence of the Sacred Masculine. This powerful force exists in us all - in our courage, strength and stability. It’s a blend of heart and head and strength without domination or the need to control.

We can celebrate all those who call forth this energy - you will know immediately who such individuals are in your life. Regardless of gender, they may, in fact, be unconscious models of stoic philosophy, which accentuates the positive by putting negative emotions and situations in perspective (but does not, as is commonly thought, suppress them,) and helps individuals hone the four stoic virtues of character: courage, temperance, justice, and wisdom.

Of course, all the above could - and has been - written about the mother - the Sacred Feminine essence, which, when blended with that of the Sacred Masculine, make balance and wholeness a possibility. These virtues are not gender-specific as they each exist within us all. Evoking our sacred (not the toxic) masculinity can catalyze a profound metamorphosis. To observe how toxic masculinity may have silenced us (“boys don’t cry, don’t be such a girl”) or restricted our creativity (“that’s just for girls”), we can begin to make space for the sacred masculinity to shine. It can empower our courageous ventures without ego-driven fear of shame, and help us recognize that being honest and vulnerable is not weak, but rather daring and valiant. When we do this work, we evoke our deepest intuitive wisdom - our inner compass that always points true north - our gnosis.

To pursue inner sense of completeness where longing and lack, resentment and bitterness may visit but not linger, we read the teachings of philosophers, poets, and mystics; we forest bathe or take mindful walks - stopping to delight in dewdrops and smell flowers; we practice a martial art, stretch breathing slow, deep, healing breaths, or dance till we’re flushed; we pour ourselves onto paper or canvas or into a wise friend’s ear… We can tap into the Sacred Masculine by pushing ourselves a bit where we know we can, and into the Sacred Feminine by being gentle with the process.

If you won’t be with a father, we hope your Father’s Day is spent calling something deep from within through some of the above - doing what you love and trying something new, perhaps reading a bit on stoicism or discussing the Sacred Masculine with a friend - or making new ones! 

If you’ll be celebrating a Father in your life - or if you are one - we wish you a very, very happy Father’s Day hoping you do everything that makes you remember and laugh till you cry.

We bow to the Sacred Masculine within you all! Our wish is for you to be profoundly nourished with all that feeds your soul. Especially… well, chocolate!